10 Fashion Trends Rich Women Would NEVER Wear (Even in Their Second Homes)

Fashion Trends Rich Women Would NEVER Wear

Rich women don’t follow fashion trends. We don’t just wear clothes; we curate timeless capsule wardrobes. Our designer handbags have waiting lists, our coats have trust funds, and our shoes? Let’s just say they’ve never been purchased online at 3 a.m. after two glasses of Pinot.

So, if you’re wondering what trends are strictly for the nouveau riche, the influencer-inclined, or the perpetually overdrafting, here’s a definitive list of fashion trends that rich women would never touch with a (diamond-encrusted) barge pole – ever.

1. Fashion ‘Hauls‘

If your outfit came in a plastic bag covered in suspicious emojis, it’s a no. A woman of wealth doesn’t “haul” — she “acquires.” And she certainly doesn’t wear polyester so thin you can see next week through it. Rich women buy fewer things that last forever (and occasionally get named in the will).

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2. Chunky Dad Sneakers That Look Like an Orthopaedic Accident

You know the ones. They’re massive. They’re neon. They’re somehow $900 for the privilege of looking like a substitute P.E. teacher. Rich women wear sleek, minimalist trainers — probably Common Projects or Chanel — and they are always spotless. Because they’ve never walked. Ever. That’s what drivers are for.

3. Loud Logos

If your outfit screams before you’ve even entered the room, congratulations: you’re rich adjacent. True wealth whispers – in cashmere. Real rich women don’t need logos; their attitude says, “I’m wearing Loro Piana, but you’ll never know because you couldn’t pronounce it anyway.”

4. Micro Sunglasses

These are not sunglasses. These are optical commas. If a woman is shielding her eyes from the press while exiting a yacht in Saint-Tropez, you better believe her eyewear covers 70% of her face and costs more than a used car. Big sunglasses say mystery. Micro sunglasses say, “Instagram paid me $300 to do this.”

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5. Co-Ords That Resemble Children’s Pyjamas

Matching pastel fluffy sets with teddy bear ears? That’s cute if you’re three years old or a Love Island contestant. Rich women do loungewear in Italian silk robes, not fleece trimmed in regret. If it looks like it was designed for a TikTok dance, she’s not wearing it.

6. Cut-Out Everything

Strategic slashes, hip holes, midriff madness — the rich woman does not need a dress that’s more hole than fabric. She doesn’t need to prove she has abs. She has a pilates instructor named Sven and a full-time lymphatic drainage therapist. She will show a clavicle. Tastefully.

7. Fast Fashion

Low-rise jeans, butterfly tops, and sparkly mesh everything? Unless it’s actual vintage Dior from 2001 and styled by Rachel Zoe, she’s not interested. A rich woman doesn’t do trends that originated in a Delia’s catalogue.

8. Plastic Accessories

A neon jelly bag might be trending, but the rich woman carries something that smells faintly of old money and Italian leather. If it squeaks when you touch it, or floats in a swimming pool, she’s not using it to store her AmEx Centurion.

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9. Overly Oversized Structured Blazers

While the rest of us are out here trying to serve “boss babe” energy in shoulder pads you could land a plane on, rich women are already the CEO — and she’s wearing a soft, double-faced cashmere wrap blazer with zero buttons.

10. Fake Glasses as an Accessory

You will not see a woman with a private banker and a private chef faking a vision problem to complete a Pinterest aesthetic. If she wears glasses, they are prescription, Cartier, and cost more than your rent.

Word of Warning

If you’re ever unsure whether something is “rich woman approved,” ask yourself: Would this be worn on a yacht or at a horse trial sponsored by Veuve Clicquot? If the answer is no, best to leave it in the returns pile.